auria “Hussein” cortes

His name is Norman Rockwell. During his lifetime he created 4,000+ paintings/illustrations. His work is featured in Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. But he’s best known for capturing the American life on canvas and magazine print.

Her name is Ruby Bridges. She is the first black child to attend a white school in the South (1960). At the time, she was only six and she made her way to school surrounded by protestors.

Rockwell painted The Problem We All Live With where he depicts Bridges ordeal. The painting, embedded above, has the word nigger painted on the wall. I’ve seen this picture many times. And like a tape recorder, my mind plays the same thoughts.

The first is that I can’t imagine how she felt attending a school where she wasn’t wanted. A brave child she was. A hero, without a doubt.

Then my mind selfishly comes back to me. More specifically, my artwork. I wonder if, as an artist, I’ll someday capture the human spirit like Rockwell.

Slowly, my thoughts shift to the school yard in Huntington Elementary School (late 1970s early 1980s). I was about the same age as Bridges when she made headlines in the 1960s. Give or take a few years.

The chant:

Fight! Fight!
A nigger and a white.
If the white don’t win,
We’ll all jump in.

It didn’t matter who was fighting. Whether it was black on black. White on white. Or a combination of the two. Clearly we had no idea what the term nigger meant. Well in hindsight, I’m pretty sure that the black kids knew what it meant. I mean, I knew what it meant to be called a spic.

We sang this schoolyard taunt in front of teachers. Every time they heard it, they’d laugh. Back then, I thought it was because they found us to be clever. Now, I’m not so sure of the reason. Even more puzzling is why they never told us what it meant or why we should stop.

When I think about Huntington Elementary, the school yard chant comes to mind. Tomorrow I’ll tell you another side of Huntington Elementary.

ETA: I realized today is Thursday. I’ll post another Huntington Elementary story on Monday instead of today.

Last night I painted while Como Quien Pierde Una Estrella (Like Losing a Star) was on a loop. The painting isn’t complete, but it’s full of sadness and sexuality. Sadness that I’m the only one who can see. And sexuality that is vulnerable. 

Translation of the lyrics appear below. I translated it so that the lyrics make sense. So the words aren’t verbatim.

I love you
I say this while mourning
The wind carries my sorrow
Wherever it chooses

I love you
What a shame that I lost you
Like someone who loses a star
And it’s lost in infinite
ohhooohhhhhhhoohhhh, oooooohhhhhh

I want my cry to be heard
How much it hurt to lose you
After loving you so
ohhhhhh aftering loving you so

Console me
Remove inside what’s killing me